Yes, I haven’t blogged in awhile. Here’s what happened: against my better judgment I did go to Lego Land and ride the roller coaster made of Legos. Sure enough, it did fall apart but luckily I escaped an almost certain death. Or so I thought. Since I had cheated death, it came after me to finish the job and…oh, wait a minute. That didn’t happen to me. That’s the plot for Final Destination 3. I haven’t seen any of the Final Destination films but how can the destination be final if they keep making sequels? And how do you start with cheating death on an airplane and end up with cheating it on a roller coaster? What’s next? “They survived the horrible merry-go-round accident but now death is after them again….” or even better: “After almost dying holding their breath in a stupid drinking game, death has decided to finish the job.” Ah, Hollywood. They’re a bunch of no talent hacks but damn it I still want to be one of them.  

Okay, so it hasn’t been anything exciting that has kept me from blogging since May. First I was finishing my script and then the wife and I decided to move back to Philly and that made things crazy. So here I am back in Philly and it’s with mixed feelings. While it is great to be back with my parents and my awesome dogs Gizmo and Nick, I do miss Burbank and being so close to the entertainment industry. Yes, you can write from anywhere (wow, I’m doing that right now!) but it’s different when you’re in LA and close to where the action is. Not to mention the fact that I really miss Warner Bros. and being able to go to that lot all of the time. I know, I know. I got laid off but I’m sure (well, kinda) that I could’ve gotten another job there. As a matter of fact, the day after we decided to move home, I got called in for a job interview at Warners but of course I didn’t get it. Mario luck has prevailed once again! And how. Check it…

Since we’ve moved home I’ve pretty much had nothing but bad luck. First day back we discovered there were bugs in our new apartment and we couldn’t move in. Second day I discovered I had a hernia (I got operated on August 28^th). Some other highlights include: My hard drive crashed on my laptop and I lost almost everything including my pictures, scripts, pitches, iTunes and a kick-ass iTunes mix of my own CDs I worked on for months (it was 6 hours long!). Yes, I could put it together again but I forget all of the songs now and it took a freakin’ long time. The bitch of it is I was going to buy an external hard drive to finally back things up but I didn’t get a chance before it happened. What else? Oh, yeah. The girl upstairs from us had a 5 year old kid and they were both as noisy and annoying as our neighbors back in Burbank (she did get evicted for not paying her rent so there was a tiny silver lining—well more like a copper lining) and just this past Sunday I finally got around to bringing my boxes of CDs and DVDs out to unpack them and discovered one of my boxes of DVDs was missing. Gone. Outta here. I take partial blame for that one cause I should’ve been more meticulous when I checked our stuff as the movers took it off the truck but it was an exhausting and stressful week and it just didn’t happen. Besides, they charged us six thousand dollars and change for the move so for that amount of cash we shouldn’t be missing a damn thing. In any case, it sucks. We called the moving company and they said they’d do their best to find it but considering it’s been three months since they dropped our stuff off I doubt they will.

Hell, before we discovered our missing box, the moving company called my wife this past Friday to see if we had a box that belonged to the people whose stuff the mover’s dropped off after us. We don’t have it but you know the people must think we do and are ripping them off so they probably have our box and are saying, “Fine, we ain’t gonna give your shit back either.” In any case, unless there is an honest person out there with missing box 37, I doubt anyone is going to give up a few thousand dollars worth of DVDs and a Marvin the Martian snow globe. The irony is I came up with the brilliant idea of numbering all of the boxes instead of putting what is in them so no one would be tempted to steal one and shit still ended up being missing. And of course it couldn’t have been a box of old magazines or something. It had to be the DVDs and the no longer available Marvin the Martian snow globe. Guess I just have to keep watching eBay and wait for the bastards to sell my stuff and then email them a can of whoop ass. Oh, and my Batman doormat is missing too. Yeah, it’s no big deal but it’s cool and I liked it. I just love how people tell me I’m too negative but who can blame me? Look at my track record, people!  

In any case, that’s what you’ve been missing or couldn’t care less about (whatever the case may be) in the last few months. Now that I have a new hard drive, I want to try to get back to the writing. And I’m still trying to get an agent so I can shop my latest script around. I’m also going to attempt to get a better and more positive attitude. I wouldn’t hold my breath for that to happen but I’m going to try. If for no other reason than to not have to keep listening to my Mom and wife telling me that I need to get one. (Insert evil snicker here).

Oh, and last but not least, I’m going to try and work on this blog a bit more diligently. Especially since my friend Glenn always reads it and keeps getting on my case for never having any new entries. So, Glenn, here’s a new entry. Happy now, biyatch? Oh, and he’s getting married this Saturday. Run! Run while you still can! Um…I mean good luck.

SUCKA!!