Well, the Oscar nominations were announced yesterday and once again, I wasn’t nominated. I know, I know. I haven’t made any movies but one can still dream, right? Keep hope alive. Oh, well, maybe next year. Of course, I’ve been saying that every year since I was eight years old. But, hey, it’s bound to happen one of these years. The law of averages and all that.

It snowed here on Sunday. There was actual snow on my car that needed to be brushed off. It was not only the first snow this winter but the first snow I have seen in nine years. Well, real snow that is. I saw plenty of fake snow on the Warner Bros. backlot. I used to see it when it was winter in the town of Stars Hollow on Gilmore Girls and in Chicago for ER. It’s amazing how cool it looks when they recreate snow on a backlot in sunny Southern California. There were times I swear I actually felt a chill. Sometimes it was the perfect snow—-a beautiful blanket of white. Other times it was dirty snow, full of exhaust soot. Sure, it’s a bunch of white stuff rolled over chicken wire but it looked real enough. As authentic as it appeared, the best thing was that it wasn’t. No shoveling the sidewalk, no brushing off your car, no sliding around on the road or slipping on ice. Yep, fake snow is the way to go. When it comes to winter, reality is highly overrated.

The guy who lives upstairs is a freak. There are too many things to delve into to illustrate this fact but since he just did one in particular as I was making my middle of the night snack of Pop Tarts, I’ll share it with you. The ceiling is paper thin so we can always hear all of the noise he makes. He goes “Woof!” all of the time. At first we thought maybe he had an odd way of sneezing but later when we heard him actually sneeze, we realized it was indeed a barking sound. I have no idea why he does it. Maybe he gets stoned and thinks he’s Scooby-Doo. Maybe he’s a huge Arsenio fan and just can’t let go and move on. Who knows? All I do know is I can’t stand living underneath the fucker.

Okay, so there’s a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles CGI-animated movie coming out this year. The one thing I’ve always found funny about them is that they all wear masks. Why? Does the whole secret identity thing really come into play with six foot giant turtles? I mean I understand why superheroes like Batman wear a mask. If he didn’t, everyone would say, “Hey, that’s Bruce Wayne beating up that clown dude. Sue, clown dude, sue!” Same thing with Spider-Man. But if you saw a six foot giant turtle walking around in a business suit—even in New York City—wouldn’t it be obvious that it’s one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? “Hey, Bob, do ya think that’s one of them Ninja Turtles?” “How the hell should I know, Dave? Those guys wear masks.” Just saying, that’s all.

Finally, is anyone else besides me psyched that McDonald’s has put the six piece Chicken McNuggets meal on the dollar menu? Sure it’s for a limited time, but hey, so is life.